“Hey maybe we can stop trying to date other people and sharing horror stories about dates and just date each other.”
Everything I’ve ever written and said about being single is true.
I like being alone. I like doing what I want. I like my freedom, my independence, my non-reliance on other people. I like cooking for 1 and drinking wine on a Tuesday and flirting with strangers. I cherish this time knowing that I am learning about myself. That being 26 and just being and living alone is an experience I will be so glad I’ve had. That I am so glad to have. Right now.
But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck.
Some nights you want to come home, kick off your shoes and snuggle up to someone on the couch. You want to hear another voice in the kitchen instead of your iphone singing a playlist. You want a text good morning, good night, or just a thinking about you message. You want to feel that feeling that your stomach is dropping on a roller coaster because of the mention of a name, or a casual glance. You want to roll over in the middle of the night and feel the familiarity of an arm around you.
You want to hold your breath as you walk into a restaurant knowing that someone is there. You want to know you have plans on a Saturday night because you have someone.
And your friends and family say they “don’t worry about you” that you will find someone and they’ll be amazing and better than you’d hoped and that your independence is an asset. That you have time and you’re young and everything happens like it should.
But you sometimes look in the mirror and wonder if they’re wrong. That you’re wrong. That every wonderful quality you think you have is skewed and you must be doing something that isn’t right because you are alone. And your friends and people you went to college with and coworkers all seem to have wonderful people that they are moving in with and getting engaged to and marrying.
And part of you feels like you’re missing the boat. That you’re being left behind.
So you truck along and go to parties and paint your nails. You put on a new dress and dance with your girlfriends. You plan trips and giggle on the phone at night and sigh as you look around your apartment and you are genuinely, really happy with life.
Because being single is awesome.
But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck.
It said “Rabbit feces in front of door in breezeway!” ok here are my problems with this violation, including the passive aggressive exclamation point.
1) I paid $200 to have this damn rabbit in a pen in my apartment. He should be able to crap all over the place.
2) It’s not even poop. It’s rabbit food that got wet while I was outside cleaning his wipeable cage accessories last night. I thought they’d rather me do it outside than down the sink. Some of the food flew back in the wind and ended up by my door.
3) I live in a damn hobbit hole, ok. I live on the ground floor but on a hill so you have to walk downstairs to get to my apartment. I’m the only apartment down here and seriously other than me no one comes down here. I feel like I should be allowed to have at least 4 rabbit poops there.
4) No one would have ever noticed my apparently mountainous piles of rabbit poop if they had bothered to fix the two repairs I sent in two weeks ago. Also why did the maintenance men tell on me?
Oh and furthermore, I have many actual lease violations going on in my house that no one has written me up for. I have 2 cats when I’ve paid for one, I’ve already dropped red food coloring on the carpet, I have 2 fish tanks instead of one, I routinely leave trash sitting out by the front door over night, I’ve broken the garbage disposal twice, and for the first 3 years I lived here I didn’t pay a pet deposit. If you’re going to write me up for a violation, go big.
ANYWAY that’s all that’s going on in my life right now.
I called out and everyone was really understanding. I’m here with my grandma now and it’s like every 10 minutes she switches from being 100% with it to being completely gone. My mom left the room to sign paperwork and she asked me how my mom was because she hadn’t seen her. I had to write her name on everything in her room and it felt like how you write your kids name in their clothes when they go off to camp.
I guess I never thought I’d be writing my grandmas name on her socks before I’d do it for a potential child.
A lot of the residents here think I’m one of their kids or grandkids. They keep telling me they haven’t seen me in years. The place is really nice and my mom and I are decorating her room nicely. We should be professional nursing home room decorators.
Do you have numbers of any coworkers to call for cover? Maybe you only show up for a half day and still help your mom? I do think its an important enough event to take precedence over work but maybe if you cover your bases first your boss wont be so mad
I sent out some messages to coworkers to cover my shift, but the main problem is that while there are plenty of people to cover the shift, I have to find someone who has a key. There are only 5 keyholders and 2 are on vacation. But good plan! I’m trying that one now. Here’s hoping!